What has happened to our world that marriage has no true commitment value any longer? No finger pointing as I have been married twice, three if you count marrying Julie twice. It seems so simple now, treat your wife as if she were your best friend, which she should be. And of course the reverse for your husband. Julie and I work our marriage as a triple braided cord with Christ as the center strand. We still have issues but we rarely if ever get into the blame game. I have friends who I love dearly but Julie is the only one I know that truly has my back 24/7. Isn't that the way it is supposed to be? I am big on personal responsibility and I imagine I haven't always been the most solid friend, but who should and can you count on when the chips really are down. You can marry for looks, or sex, or money, or whatever, but shouldn't we all be looking and wanting someone to care for us no matter what? Now I have this with Christ and if something were to happen to Julie He would sustian me. If you read the Bible though, God did not just create intimacy just for procreation. We should be bound to our spouse as we are one, as an extension of our own body. If you were not as coordinated with one hand as the other would you cut it off?
When someone comes to me to speak of challeges with a spouse I always ask them if they could be married to themselves. That's why Julie is so awesome because I probably wouldn't put up with me.haha There are definite situations where one spouse is acting worse than another. This is why we should do our best to marry someone we truly like. We accept the faults of people we like, but expect our spouses to be near perfect. Ladies and gentlemen, especially ladies, men to a great deal and people in general don't change just because you say they should. If you are in a shaky or bad marriage please turn to Christ. First it will give you someone for support. Next as you may not be feeling good about yourself He will show you the love you deserve. This will allow you to survive and give you the heart to try and find out why your spouse is loving you properly. Now if you are in a dangerous mental or physically abusive relationship get out!! These other rules don't apply because harm is different than disagreement. For just the bad relationships though we need to try and understand why our spouse is acting out. I do not believe there are a handful of truly evil, mean, or unlovable people out there. If you married them, for the most part, they have some redeeming quality. Their actions are from anger, hurt, fear, and a bigee past emotional pain. There are numbers of good Christian relationship books out there to help and in the beginning you may be the only one working at it. Christ will give you the strength if you lean on Him. Yours in Christ

What's truly important!

Hello friends, I hope all of you are well. It is at times difficult to know what to write because I have not to date had any readers. That is ok because God will guide those who may need guidance. If you are the first you may ask who are you to guide? As I state often I was once where you maybe now, lost in the world. I was lost in the middle of the crowds of people wh0 were also lost and would not admit it. To admit you don't have many if any of the answers in todays world or even yesterdays appears weak. To me that is why there are so many suicides, especially teen suicides. We as adults don't or can't figure out how to love and be happy so how are we to guide the children. Children are given way too much credit and leeway these days. There are exceptions to everything but children need and want guidance. We have stretched ourselves so thin economically that we must have 2 incomes and place way too much emphasis on things for our happiness. I am an avid golfer and truly enjoy the game, but no great round could ever replace a big long hug from my wife,son, or daughters. No vacation could fill my heart like being able to cry on the shoulder of my wife,my best friend, when life gets to heavy. And believe me no matter how much you may have life figured out it will always get to heavy sooner or later. I enjoy watching TV and probably too much but could any show or movie ever replace your child coming in a sitting on your lap to just say I love you and I need you. We should never assume that our loved ones know that we love them, that goes for young or old. Most of us have a story of someone we would have loved to have said I love you to just one more time. Only God knows the number of our days. I could fall over right here at this keyboard and everyone would be shocked because I am in good health, but it happens. I feel and cry so much for you out there who feel no really cares or loves you. As bad as it is to say unfortunately for some that is true. This is why I so want you to know Jesus. I know He may not seem real and you so want someone to hold and hug you and tell you how awesome you are. He is real and He does want you to know you are awesome and special and your life means something. When I was a teenager I was looked at like I was someone. I was a good baseball player and people thought I had it together. They didnt know that inside I was scared and weak always try to fit in. I wanted to be cool and popular and say funny things. We all want to be accepted and loved but we usually look in the wrong places. If you are young and dealing with peer pressure, or 30-40sih and dealing with career and family pressure, or senior and dealing with loneliness and weary of life pressure go to Jesus. He calls for you and wants to love you and to show you you are worth loving. I cried out to Him while pulled over the side of the road of I-15 south below Las Vegas. He heard me and loved me and cried out with joy when I finally chose Him. If you want someone to love you unconditionally, if you want someone who will love you at your worst, if you need someone to understand that you can not always be strong then cry to Jesus. I can attest to this because He has done that for me. This is not my opinion or way of looking at what life has been. If you knew my life before Christ and see my life now you would understand. My life now is not always a bed of roses and Gods timing isn't just what I would want it to be, but He is with me always. He gives me what I need whether I want it, like it, or understand it and He has never failed me. I sincerest prayer if for you to find this love. I pray you will believe what I share because I recieve no gain. I will probably never know any of you out there. God will know and will bless my heart by saying to me Well done my good and faithful servant. May God meet you where you are and bless your every breathing day.

Yours in Christ

Me, my wife, daughter and her boyfriend went to the Rockin Worship Roadshow last night with some more of our friends. It is truly amazing and energizing when 5 to 6000 people come together and sing praises to God. The main band was MercyMe but they had several other performers. It is a great venue and they only charge $10 admission so cost is not an issue. I remember when I used to go to concerts and I would end up drunk and stoned. Those concerts were always an attempt to fill some inner need and I guess these are too. The need now is to give thanks and praise to the One who saved me. I don't know who will read this first and in what situation they may be. Maybe God just has me writing this for my own good. I haven't gotten very deep yet because I don't exactly know what to write. I know that the concerts before were to escape and rid myself of the life that wouldn't fill me. The music and words I study are to fill me so that I may make the best of the awesome life He has blessed me with now. I can't give you that life in this blog. Only God can give you new life, as He gave me. I don't know what you maybe looking for, but if you don't love yourself or your life I might be able to lead to a better place. Have a great day Yours in Christ

I was thinking today about why anyone would listen or put any stock in what I share in this blog. First because God will bring those He desires and they will chose to trust what I share or not. Next is because I am just like you. The only difference is that I have allowed Jesus to heal my wounds. I must admit that when some of the people I grew up with read this it may be strange or humurous to them. I was not a big man on campus or suave with the ladies. I might have been similar to Charlie Brown but not that cool.haha I don't know when I lost my self confidence, I think sometime in junior high school. I guess I was kind of stuck in the middle. I played baseball with alot of The Crowd but we didn't really hang together. Don't get me wrong, as popular groups go the gang at my school were pretty good. I won't go in too deep right now but high school wasn't exactly a good self esteem place for me. Starting to smoke pot didn't help because instead of face my short comings I just avoided them. Although I was pretty good at baseball I never really put in the work to at least have a chance at being great. Then I just got into a habit of quitting things. I joined the Navy to try and push myself and it helped some but I still just put enough effort in to get by. Years of failing, at least in my mind, caused more pot and other recreational drugs. After one failed marriage I slipped into years of clubbing and partying the old drugs,sex, and rock and roll.

I know this isn't exactly a special story. For twenty years I tried to find happiness and ways to fill the holes in my heart. I lost a great woman, didn't give enough or the proper love and attention to my children, and lost about any respect I had for myself. I share all this so you will know I've been to most of the places you've been. So if you didn't know how to play golf and I did maybe you would listen to me.

God saved me from myself. He gave me back my family, respect, and hope. Mostly He showed me how to love myself and that I am wonderful in His eyes. I had good parents but I had never before felt this unconditional love. I won't play the blame game for my life. I don't say that I have endured all that some of you out there have endured. But something I will state in most all my postings is that God loves you and wants you to love yourself and have a good life. I will not have all the answers to all of your questions. God does but we don't always understand them. So if I don't or can't give you a good answer blame me not God.

There are still struggles most everyday and I don't always feel like a million bucks. What everyday is though is a blessing and a chance to share what Jesus did for me. Life is more awesome than I could ever put into words.

All I know is that before I kept doing the same thing over and over and waited for something different to happen. If your tired of the same old thing maybe your ready to give God a chance, even if you don't believe in Him, He believes in you. Yours in Christ

Hello. Welcome to all my new friends. This, as you veterens may notice, is my first blog. I am a 50 year old dinosaur when it comes to computer stuff. I have this so that I like many of you can share some of my life experience. Take what you like and leave the rest. As this blog matures you will see more clearly where my heart lies.

I have'nt set up much of my cover page so let me share now that I am a born again Christian. I gave my life to Jesus on November 26, 2000 at 3:43 pm. I like some of you never truly understood the born again thing until it happened to me. Needless to say my life was changed. Jesus showed me that He loved me unconditionally and that is what I want to share with any of you who desire to hear.

Let me start by assuring you of a few things. First I will not lie to you about anything. If you ask something I consider too personel or that may be injurious to those close to me I will not share. This may not be in the spirit of this medium but that is me. I desire no gain for this other than to share with you the infinite love of God.

I have written a book of my walk with God since my rebirth. I will in no way attempt to influence you to buy this book. It is another medium to share with all who will listen. It is not presently in publication and as I said I will not pump my book here. If you want iformation I will share it but you must ask.

I will not argue with you on this page. I realize there will be discussion and debate but we will not argue. If you appear to desire insult or antagonism I will do what is necessary to block you. You do not have to agree with what I share with you. What I share are my experiences and how God has carried me through the hard times.

Here is the Reader's Digest version. At the low point of my life I was a drug using, womanizing, gambling addict. While alchol never really grabbed me we were not strangers. I used one or all of these to combat my feelings of failure and low self-esteem. Suicide was never extremely far from my mind and had almost occured several years ago. While listening to a sermon by Rev. Billy Graham directed at a group of youth God opened my eyes to the truth. Rev. Graham told the audience that he was sorry that he could not go a day without sinning. This really shocked me. While I know he is just a man I believe him to be a great man of God. What he explained was that he would always fail because he wasn't strong enough. He told them that only way he could get through the day was with the strength of Christ. He explained that God knows we are weak and He wants us to use His strength to do our best. In hearing this I realized that God loved me anyway,even when I failed. It was like a weight had been lifted off of me. I had always felt that I had especially failed God. I believed in God most of my life and felt I had let Him down many times after He had helped me out of many bad situations. What I mostly realized is that God and Jesus love me no matter what. Even when I was sinning at my worst They loved me and desired better for me. I know as a parent I could never hate any of my children. I may not be able to accept their behavior or choices but I could never hate them. Most of any disappointment with them is about the hurt and pain they may cause themselves. This is what I hope to convey to any of you who thind you are unlovable, as I once did. God wants all of His children, especially the ones that believe the church roof will fall in if they enter.

If this reaches into your hearts I will do my best to help you love yourselves they way you should and the way Jesus wants you to. Yours in Christ